Hello Teacher David.
My thanks for your assistance on The Path. My questions today deal with Right Speech.
I have been aware of the five factors of well-spoken speech since reading it in your first book and listening to the corresponding class.
Until quite recently I had been focused mostly on other parts of the 8 Fold Path. My speech has been really not all that good and I decided to focus on that for a bit. All of a sudden I found myself nearly unable to speak. Almost everything I wanted to say clearly contradicted at least one of the five factors.
I stay quiet when I have nothing constructive to say. I suppose I must be a chatterbox because now people think I am brooding or frustrated. Is this typical for students? Do people become naturally quieter when following The Path? It seems to me like they might because so much human communication appears to be unnecessary, negative, and spurious.
I hope this finds you well…
Teacher David:
Hello Amber…sure, I will help you.
>>>>> Hello Teacher David. My thanks for your assistance on The Path.
You are welcome ma’am… pleased to help you and support you on The Path to Enlightenment.
>>>>> My questions today deal with Right Speech. I have been aware of the five factors of well-spoken speech since reading it in your first book and listening to the corresponding class. Until quite recently I had been focused mostly on other parts of the 8 Fold Path. My speech has been really not all that good and I decided to focus on that for a bit. All of a sudden I found myself nearly unable to speak. Almost everything I wanted to say clearly contradicted at least one of the five factors.
That is understandable and sometimes part of one’s journey.
The mind is intellectually seeing the issues more clearly and making different decisions than in the past. This will produce wholesome results (i.e. wholesome Kamma).
>>>>> I stay quiet when I have nothing constructive to say.
Wise decision….
>>>>> Suppose I must be a chatterbox because now people think I am brooding or frustrated. Is this typical for students?
Yes, as you are making changes, the people around you will notice. And, if they are clinging to their perceptions, their mind may be making assumptions that are not true. That will lead to their own discontentedness.
Remember, your goal is not to meet others expectations but instead, to focus on developing wisdom to make wiser decisions.
So if people are expecting you to be more chatty and they become discontent when you are not, that is due to their own cravings/desires/attachments. As you go forward in life, you will change, and so will they.
Sometimes people look at an individual changing as a negative. But, change is important and everyone is constantly changing. It is normal, it is impermanence.
>>>> Do people become naturally quieter when following The Path?
In some cases, yes….at least temporarily.
But, as the mind becomes wiser and brightens up, there will be conversation. Conversations become more purposeful with clear and concise speech.
You will notice all the erroneous words you use as you start to clean it up, being more clear and concise in your communication, thus, being more successful, productive, and influential.
>>>>> It seems to me like they might because so much of human communication appears to be unnecessary, negative, and spurious.
In many cases, yes…that is true.
>>>>> I hope this finds you well…
Thank you for your kind words.
Amber replies to Teacher David
Thank you for reminding me that I am not responsible for the discontentedness of others which is often based on assumptions and cravings.
I was taught the opposite as a child and it is a struggle to change that perception while being mindful of the potential of causing harm.
I am encouraged that the fact others notice a difference is an indication of change on my part.
Thank you for your guidance. Be well.